Day 5 post op

Today was the bast day I've had so far, besides the fact that I have a bit of an episode a couple hours after I woke up.

So I'll start from the beginning: I woke up around 7:30 today, giving me 6 and a half hours of sleep! Much of an improvement considering I'd sleep for 4 hours and then wake up in agony. I gave myself some medication and fell back asleep around 8 to 12, when Evan came in.

We decided to watch a movie right away, however I was really dehydrated and not knowing it. By the end of the movie I was hot, uncomfortable, and struggling to breathe. Had a bit of a panic attack, but finally got some medication in and a lot of apple sauce and water.

Evan then took me for a walk around the block, which was okay for about half of it, but going uphill on the way back was too much and I became too weak. Evan basically had to carry me back to the house.

When I came back I ate a lot of sorbet, which actually ended up having seeds in it... I swear it was just the colouring. During this time I watched Reba on DVD and was trying so hard not to laugh or smile, but a couple times I accidentally snorted or blew a bit through my nose while trying to keep myself from laughing. It freaked me out a bit, but I was still able to breathe through my nose, so I thought I was fine. But when I went to rinse out my mouth and brush my teeth, a HUGE chunk of blood made it's way out of my mouth. Scary shit. Now I'm struggling to breathe out of one nostril.

The good news about that is that I can actually open my mouth enough to get my toothbrush in and brush my tongue and the inside of my teeth.

Overall I think I'm healing much faster than intended. The only pain I've had today was in my joints, and once I took my pain medication the only soreness has been in my stitches, as I'm actually able to smile quite well and open my mouth quite a bit. I spent most of the day without elastics on, since my surgeons said I could, but I'm keeping them on now in fear that it will change my bite if I don't. 

My pain level has gone up and down, but lately has stayed at a 4/10. My discomfort has been about a 5/10. 

My swelling has gone down so much I can't believe it. I almost look the way I did before surgery. I have a bit of puffyness in the bottom of the right side of my cheek, and some on the side of my nose on the left. But other than that, everything looks pretty symmetrical. Also, 80% of the swelling under my chin has disappeared.

My numbness has basically become nothing. It's in my lower lip and chin and under my left eye, but that's it.

My bruising is still very yellow, and very obvious. That will probably go away in a few days though.

I've had lots of ice cream and apple sauce so my energy hasn't been too bad since I went for a walk.

I'm hoping that I just heal quite fast and that this isn't a sign that anything bad is actually happening, and I hope I didn't screw up my new sinuses by blowing a bit through them.

I don't think I ever mentioned what they found in my nasal passage did I?

Well even if I did, I'll explain it again.

So while they were doing the surgery, they opened up my nasal passage and found a bone spur. Basically, my surgeon thinks that when I was very young, the bones around my nasal cavity just started growing this little piece of bone - I guess you could call it a deformity. So when you see a skull, and you see 2 holes where your nose is, my left(?) nose hole had a piece of bone growing through my sinuses. Weird.

Also, apparently my sinuses were "really messed up" as my surgeon put it. All twisted and weird, which my mom thinks is hereditary, as she has horrible sinuses. She gets sinus infections 3 times a year.

So he fixed it all up and I have brand new sinuses! Woohoo.

I'm still suprised I can breathe through them so early in the healing process. 

I'm seeing my surgeons partner again tomorrow, to ask him a few questions and tell him about how I can breathe so soon, and if I can eat mashed potatoes yet and bla bla bla. So I shall update tomorrow!!

I've been horrible with pictures, and I can't find my good webcam, but I managed to take front view and side profile pictures on my shitty webcam. Here's to being almost a week post op!

5 Days post op Front View

Right side of my profile

Left side of my profile

Day 4 post op

So today has been as big of a struggle as the last couple days. My energy is so low because of the fact that anything with protein in it makes me violently ill, so I've barely been walking around.

The pain has decreased though, even if it's just a little bit. Most of my pain has moved towards my joints and my temples. However, I still get pretty severe pain in my stitches and where they cut my bone.

I somehow managed today to take a shower, which was actually quite horrible because I had no energy to even lift my arms. I had to sit in the shower and it took me 40 minutes to wash my hair and shave under my arms.

Then I got dressed and went to see my surgeons partner. He said everything was going good, he says I'm doing a good job at brushing my teeth and taking my elastics on and off. He says that I need to walk around more though, and that everything I'm feeling is perfectly natural.

And then on the way home my mom closed the car window on my wrist. OUCH.

My bruising has peaked today, it's basically just yellow. Not much bruising. And my swelling has gone down tremendously since yesterday.

I weighed myself today, as I did 2 days ago, and I've lost 5 pounds already. I am now 110 pounds. I look anorexic.

Evan is finally coming home tomorrow, even if it's only for a couple days. He's going to take me for a walk around my street, since I need to get walking more.

My pain level is about a 6/10 and my discomfort is a 8/10.

The only 3 words I keep saying over and over again is: Kill Me Now.

Surgery tomorrow!!

Wow, I can't believe I'm actually going in for surgery tomorrow.
I'm actually in denial I think, I have random moments of anxiety but then I'm fine.

Everything I need for at least the first week has been purchased. My humidifier is working like a charm, and now Evan and I are just sitting here on our laptops.

I have no idea what I'm going to have for my last meal, but I hope it's good. Maybe chicken. Who knows.

The last thing I need to do is pack my bag for tomorrow... So far this is what I'm bringing.

• Slippers
• Sweater
• Baby toothbrush
• Mouthwash given to me by my surgeon
• Lamby

Lamby is my stuffed animal (a lamb, obviously) that I've had literally since the day I was born. She's no longer pink, and the polka dots have faded, and her nose is half falling off, but she's like my security blanket :)

Since this is my last pre-op post, I'll just quickly go over what my surgeon is doing:

He's moving my upper jaw 3mm up and 4mm forward. My lower jaw is being moved 8mm forward and rotated upward slightly. Somehow while doing this he's changing the plane of my bite, and somehow this is opening up my airways so I can breathe twice as much.
Because of my cold, he's putting a nasal tube in my nose. I'm praying to god they're gonna put a tube through my nose into my stomach cause I definitely don't want to throw up blood. Actually, I definitely don't want to throw up at all.

Thanks to everyone who has read my blog through these last few months of being pre-op. I'm very happy to get on the other side of the electrical saw and start the healing process! Hopefully it's a good recovery and I don't swell too much.

I'll post when I get back from the hospital!! eeeeek

I've been cleared!!!

So I am very happy to report that I went to my surgeons today and have been cleared for surgery!! I will still be getting it done in two days :)

I got a lousy sleep last night, which sucked, but I woke up and dropped mom off at work. Then I went back home and a few hours later I went to my surgeons office.
I walked into the room that my parents and I were in the last time we were there.
My surgeon walks in with this bigger man, and he introduced himself as the anesthesiologist. Him and my surgeon then took a tongue depressor and jabbed it all the way to the back of my tongue, and I could hear them say things like "swollen glands" and "swollen tonsils" and such. I expected that much, my tonsils always swell up and it's really annoying.

Then the anesthesiologist told me he was gonna check my chest. He put the stethoscope (or whatever it's called) to my throat, then my chest, and then on my back. When he was on my chest though he went basically in my bra and I was like oh this is weird. But whatever. Then he said my chest was cleared and I was like woohoo!!

Then he asked me if I actually feel sick. I said no. Which, I don't. I'm just tired all the time lol. I'm putting that down to either oversleeping or not sleeping enough. Then they looked in my nose and the anesthesiologist made some comments to my surgeon and my surgeon responded that I'll need a nasal tube. Then the bad part... My surgeon asked if I have any nasal congestion. I thought this meant pressure in my nose and like sinus swelling or something, so I said no, and that I only blew my nose a couple times a day.
Which, I then later found out that nasal congestion means stuffy nose and I pretty much still have that. And I may have under exaggerated how many times I blow my nose a day. In realistic terms I'd say 5 times a day, maybe a bit more, but definitely not over 10. I don't know why I said 2, I think it's because all I remembered was barely blowing my nose yesterday or today. Ugh, I don't know.

But it scares me now cause it's like, is that incredibly important information? Are the chances of me dying greater now that you think I don't have any congestion in my nose?

Anyways, to finish off the appointment he took all these pictures of me - Well, of my face - and then gave me an anti-microbial mouth wash that I need to start brushing with tonight.

In the meantime, I'm trying to clean my room as fast as possible, so I can just lie down and rest and drink lots of water and get better before surgery.

Last night I had my last steak - I'm going to miss steak so much :(

Yellow Light?

Since surgery is 4 days away I'm probably going to be posting everyday, just because there's so much information :)

So in my last post I was freaking out about being sick/ rattling in my lungs. Today I went to the walk in clinic and the doctor assured me that I don't have a sinus infection or bronchitis, which made me SO happy, because I am very prone to bronchitis. So he did say that he heard some congestion in my chest, and just to take over the counter All-In-One Decongestant. I haven't bought that yet but I found some stuff in my house that worked until tomorrow when I buy some more.
The doctor said he suspects I'll be only getting better from here, so I got home and called my surgeon, which was kind of frustrating.
The woman who answered the phone seemed reluctant to let me speak to my surgeon, and suggested I just tell him tomorrow when I see him for the "Photo Shoot". When I insisted, she put me on hold for a few minutes, then suddenly picked up the phone and said "Hello Allison?" I said "This is Rebecca" and she said "Oh one minute" and HUNG UP.

I was like what the hell... So I waited a few minutes, then decided to wait until I see him tomorrow. I checked the voicemails and somehow the lady left a voicemail without even calling, and said my surgeon would like to speak to me ASAP. So I called back and told him everything. He asked me how I was generally feeling and I said I feel great except for the congestion in my chest.

So after a while of talking, my surgeon said he's pretty sure we can still go ahead with the operation, but that he wants to move my appointment from tomorrow to Wednesday, because an Anesthesiologist comes in on Wednesdays and Fridays and he wants her or him to check me out to make sure I can receive General anesthetic. So Basically it's like I'm at a yellow light, waiting for the OK.

This SUCKS. Not only did I JUST get the ability to breathe through my nose back, but I'm still congested, and in 4 days I won't be able to breathe through my nose again (If I get the OK)

But, I am to go along as if the whole thing is still happening. So I have plans to clean and prepare everything tomorrow.

In other news, my family is walking around like nothing is about to happen. My sister is complaining constantly about how everyone is paying more attention to the fact that I'm sick, rather than to the fact that she's sick. She went on this rampage about how I do nothing with my life and bla bla bla. So now my parents are catering to that bitch. I'm literally 4 days away and I'm not even close to ready. I'm sick so I can't leave the house to go buy everything I need, so my mom has to do everything I should be doing. I could do it by myself, but my surgeon basically put me on bed rest until I see him. 

In regards to how I'm feeling... I'm scared. Nervous. Anxious. Everything that I should be feeling at this point. I'm sad to see my old face go, but excited to embrace the new one. It's not going to be a huge change, my surgeon says. But still a change.

I'll update tomorrow on my sickness and everything that's going on :)

Anxiety/Still very sick

So 95% of my cold has disappeared. However, I'm still blowing my nose, and now there's rumbling in my throat/lungs. I'm freaking out. If I can't do the surgery I'm going to cry.

On top of this, because I am feeling a lot better, my anxiety is kicking in. Surgery is only 4 and a half days away... So either I don't get to do the surgery and be disappointed forever, or I do get to do it and I have panic attacks every day. Woohoo I love being pre-op...

I'm so stressed I'm not thinking straight. I'll know for sure in the next couple days whether or not I can do the surgery.

I'll update when I know anything

:(

Surgery Update: Surgical Hooks on and ONE WEEK TO GO

Hello again everyone!!
I am happy to tell you all that I finally got my surgical hooks on!!!

I went in today and got them hooked onto my braces, the cool thing is that they're bendable so i can bend them in such a way so they don't annoy me. But at the same time it worries me that they won't be strong enough to hold onto the elastics post-surgery. Oh well, we'll see.

This is what they look like:

Excuse my ripped up lips, when I get anxiety I tend to tear them apart.


ONE WEEK TO GO!!!
My anxiety isn't that bad right now. I'm actually very excited to see my new face... Well kind of. I keep looking at all the old pictures of me and my boyfriend, or me and my friends/family, and I'm finding myself sad that I'll never be like that anymore, that eventually I'll look at these pictures and not recognize myself, basically like looking a stranger. But I'm keeping optimistic. I'm just excited to get the first week over and done with...

So anyways, when I saw my orthodontist, I was having a bad case of sniffles, since my cold is still going strong. He said that if I still have a cold by surgery time then it might not happen. NOT impressed. I will admit, I wasn't the nicest to my boyfriend for a couple hours after that, who gave me the cold.

In more surgery related news, my surgeons office called yesterday and said my surgeon wants to take a photo shoot with me this upcoming Tuesday; I guess to make sure that everything he's doing to my face won't make me look funny. I actually don't know why. But the lady I spoke to and I both laughed at the thought of having a photo shoot with my surgeon lmfao.

Nothing else is new other than that though. Today I got a hair cut & ombre highlights, just so I can still feel slightly pretty after surgery. You can't really notice them to be honest. They're very subtle. The cool thing is that they'll lighten in the sun this summer and then my hairdresser and I were thinking of dying my hair RED... oooooh.
 I also did most of my surgery/post-op shopping today but I still need to get more stuff, and I'm just nursing my cold basically. I pray to god that I don't get a sinus infection like my boyfriend did, and that I'm fine for surgery. I've waited 3 years for this, and my surgeon is away on vacation the following week, so I refuse to postpone this any longer.

Once I finishing buying all the shit I need for surgery I'll post pictures of it all :)

I shall leave you with a picture I just took of sick Becca with her new haaaaaaiiirr chillin beside a Honey Badger
TTFN
Ta Ta For Now

NO GENIOPLASTY

As if i'm making a post less than a day after my previous one,
but I have huge news!!!


So I woke up this morning and was totally bored, as per usual, so I decided to go play some piano. The phone rings and my sister yells that it's my surgeon, so I rush to answer it. Our conversation went like this:

Me: Hello?
Surgeon: Hi, is this Rebecca?
Me: Yep
Surgeon: Can I speak to your mom?

Um. What.
So I hand the phone to mom, she answers, continually saying "okay..." every few seconds. She breaks out in a smile and gives me a thumbs up, then shakes her head while pointing to her chin, which indicated that my surgeon was saying no Genioplasty. I was so confused, so when she finally got off the phone with him, she tried to explain everything to me as best as she could but she's pretty bad at it and not only that, but she didn't ask my surgeon any of the questions that I need to know.

Basically she said that he said he did a "Mock surgery" and realized I don't need it. Also, he mentioned something about my airways being more open after they are done with my upper jaw. He also told mom that I should call him back if I had any questions, so I wrote down a few and gave him a call.

Once I got him on the phone and explained that my mom is bad at explaining things, he burst out laughing. Then explained everything I need to know. I zoned out through some parts, but I know that he said that when he did measurements and put pieces together and bla bla bla (the mock surgery) he said that the lift he is giving to my lower jaw will give me enough of a chin to look proportionate, and I thiiiink (I hope) he meant that it will give me the support in my lower lip that the Genioplasty would have done anyways. He also made an example of a tongue depressor or cigar being bit by your molars and how it goes on an angle and mine is too steep so he's fixing the "Plane" of my bite while doing my upper jaw, so it'll open up my airways TWICE as much, making my snoring almost gone and have little to no chance of developing sleep apnea.

However, he is moving my jaw outwards as well, so I asked him if this is going to change the shape of my nose, and he said a little. He explained that whenever you move your bones, your soft tissue moves half as much. So because of my upper jaw moving out 4mm, my nose will move about 2mm. I told him that my nose  kind of points up at the end so I'm afraid that I'll develop a "piggy nose", and he said that he's doing minimal movement so that most likely won't happen, but you never know. So my concern has gone from having permanent feeling loss in my chin/lower lip, to having a pig nose.

Oh well, we'll see what the surgery brings. I'm very excited actually, but at the same time concerned because my surgeon said the Genioplasty will help shut my lips and now that it's not happening, I don't know if my lips will be as shut. Probably. I don't know.

I need to chill. He's a good surgeon and I'm being stupid.

Anyways if anything else changes or if I call and get more information out of him, then I'll update again :)

SICK

Sick, I am sick.

SICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICK

It actually isn't that bad, a little sore throat, but since my boyfriend gave it to me and he's coughing up nasty crap, I'm assuming that will happen to me too.

A week and a half pre-op too!!! I hope I'm better for the surgery.

First off I want to apologize for having my tags say "underbite" as I am stupid and for some reason put that there. I have an OVERBITE. not Underbite.

Also I should probably start communicating more with other people on their blogs because I just assumed you don't know who's following you, but I came on Blogger 5 minutes ago and it said I had one follower!!! So to my one follower I LOVE YOU :)

I think my goal is to get my followers. Just so I know I'm actually sharing my journey through all of this with people, you know?

What else is going on in my boring life....

My mom started having a panic attack over some of the things I was saying today about my surgery. She freaks out over everything. I was trying to explain to her, that if I could do all of this over again, I'd choose my own orthodontist, I'd choose my surgeon, I'd get second opinions, because I never did that. I was just handed whoever. Who knows, maybe I'd prefer another surgeon over my current one. Not to say my current one is unqualified.

I'm terrified about throwing up after surgery!!! Helpppp. My surgeon said that only 1 in 20 of his patients throw up after surgery but KILL ME I swear to god I'm going to be that person. I don't want to sound like a whiny bitch so sorry if I do haha.

I literally have nothing to talk about... maybe The Walking Dead?
Who saw the season finale tonight?
Seriously not what I expected it to be. I'm not gonna put any spoilers but holy shit.

This post is getting to be pointless.

I hope everyone had an incredible Easter weekend or Passover! I'll post soon.. getting my hair done soon so maybe I'll post pictures. WHO KNOWS.

TWO WEEKS!

Hello there everyone,

Just thought I'd make a quick post because Evan is off getting pizza, but mostly because today marks 2 weeks before my surgery!

I'm starting to get mixed feelings... I've kept telling myself this whole time that this surgery is necessary but is it really? It's not causing me any TMJ pain, or problems chewing or speaking, the only thing is that the right side of my jaw clicks. And that doesn't even hurt. Also I'm starting to realize this decision was almost never mine. My Orthodontist basically told me I had to do it. Or made it such a big deal that I thought it was necessary.
Apparently this surgery is supposed to prevent things, but the risks involved are developing the things I'm trying to prevent?
Am I even old enough to handle such a surgery?

On the other hand, I am quite excited. This surgery has been talked about for 3 years, and the day is only 2 weeks away.

But seriously, is all this even worth my face completely changing when I don't even have any issues? Like yeah my lips don't touch, but that's cosmetic. And I've been trying to convince myself that this isn't cosmetic, since I'm against that, but I'm failing miserably.

For my friends and family that read this, any words of encouragement would be appreciated. I'm starting to get nervous already, and I know some people close to me don't agree with this surgery at all, which makes me even more nervous.

I'll post soon, the latest being a week from now when I get my surgical hooks on!!